


I’ll Protect You

by JJLives



Category: RWBY
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-31
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-10-01 05:32:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17238335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JJLives/pseuds/JJLives
Summary: Just a little more closure from V6:E5. BumbleBY





	I’ll Protect You

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own RWBy nor any of its characters nor am I affiliated with its creators or the show

AN: I had this floating around my head for like weeks and I had the day off and just couldn’t do anything without writing this so here it is.  I hope you enjoy.

* * *

 

 

 

“I’ll protect you.”

I scoff, trying to get the taste of the words off my tongue.  Three words. Alone they are completely harmless, and even together they aren’t so bad.  I’ve said them so many times and it might have even been my mantra at one point. Raising Ruby hadn’t been easy. Keeping her safe fell on me because no one else was there to do it.  She was all I had left, and I wasn’t going to lose her too. I took the bruises from the bullies that bugged her for wearing her cloak, Summers cloak. It didn’t matter, my bruises I wore like badges of honour, each a new triumph, proof that I was doing my job.  I was protecting her. And when she cried herself to sleep almost every night, calling out for arms that would never be able to reach for her ever again, I was there. I’d wrap her in my own and squeeze her as tight as I could, trying to mimic the strength of the arms she craved. I’d whisper encouraging things. I told her everything would work out, that things would get better.  I’d repeat  _ ‘I’m here, I’ll protect you. _ ’ Over and over again until she’d fall asleep in my arms.

I’d tried to make her happy; spent more than my share of energy and time making her smile and laugh every day.  But that in itself was still a form of protection. I wanted to protect her from the sadness. I think I did a pretty good job but there were always days I felt like a failure as nothing I did could cheer her up.  No jokes were funny enough, no goofy faces surprising enough, no story captivating enough to replace the tears with a smile. 

_ ‘I’ll protect you.’ _

The words echo in my head and I kick at a clump of snow in front of me, like it’s to blame.  I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to say those three words together ever again without hearing her voice echoing them back in my head, mocking me, pitying me.

_ ‘I’ll protect you.’ _

I turn and open the door next to me, a pathetic attempt to escape the sound ringing in my head. The aroma overtakes me before I can process with my eyes.  I’ve walked into a coffee shop. The warmth washes over me and I’m instantly aware of the stinging of my cold cheeks and my chapped lips, both a result of the cold temperatures outside.  I lick my lips, wincing at their dried and cracked surface. I make my way to the counter and order a coffee, thinking I might as well busy my mind with something now that I’m here. There’s a few groups chatting animatedly and I take a seat once I’m handed a warm mug.  

The cacophony of voices and laughter surround me and it’s almost loud enough to drown out the voices in my own head.  I take a sip from the cup in my hands and feel the warm liquid cut through the cold as it travels down my throat to rest below my heart.  It’s like a furnace heating me from within. It’s oddly reminiscent of the fire that used to burn deep inside me. It’s flicker used to remain, just below the surface, but I hadn’t been able to ignite it since that night at Beacon.  It’s still like a piece of me is missing, and I don’t mean the chunk of flesh I’ve been without.

I look to my right hand, bending the metallic fingers into a fist before opening the fingers one at a time. I watch them move, so like the appendages they’ve replaced, and yet so very different.  A flash of someone else’s soft hands gripping the cold metal comes forward in my mind.

_ ‘I’ll protect you.’ _

My eyes fly shut to block the image but it’s no use, the image still dances in the dark recesses behind my covered eyes.  The worst part, is the small flame had warmed me for the split seconds before she said those three words. I could feel it, reacting to her words.  It reacted to the earnest look in her eyes. It hadn’t been near as strong as it used to be, more of a flicker than anything but that was more than I’d felt in so long. It gave me hope that maybe I wasn’t as broken as I thought.  Maybe I could become whole once more. Then she said those words and the flame went out. It disappeared and even now, I still can’t feel it’s tiny spark I’ve become accustomed to. 

It terrifies me, because that flame was me, it was Yang. Without it though, how can I be me without that shining light to guide me.  I’ve been following its guiding flicker and all it told me was to get to Ruby, find Ruby. It had hinted at a promise of more once that one task was complete.  It lied. It flared a little at my reunion with Weiss and then again with Ruby, enough for me to finally respond to her words from months ago. But even as I went through the motions of our reunion, there was something missing, someone missing.  Our group would never be the same again, with Pyrrha’s death, JNPR would never be whole again. And it was so achingly apparent that our own team was just as lost without  _ her _ .  A table with only three legs, piles of burdens placed at its top, we were all just waiting for the weight to topple us. And I’d been sure it would, at Haven, without her beside me to help hold my half. I was sure I’d be crushed beneath the weight. I was sure in my weakened state of not being whole I would bring Ruby and Weiss down with me.

Then she was suddenly there and the flame inside me danced at the sight of her.  How or why she was there didn’t matter, just that she was there taking some of the weight off my shoulders.  And I could breathe again.

I expected her to explain. When the immediate threats were no more I wanted, I  _ needed, _ her to tell my why.  But she’d been busy with her parents, with the faunus, with some girl named Ilia, with  _ Sun _ .

She’d promised.  She’d promised Weiss, she’d promised Ruby, she’d promised  _ me. _ She was supposed to come to us the next time something big happened. She was supposed to run to us, not away from us; never away from  _ me _ . It hurt that she left, but it felt like a knife in the back when I found out Sun had been with her the whole time. It hurt more than the feeling of Adam’s blade.  It was a blade wielded by her, and it cut deep.

“Can I join you?”

I jump at the voice and look up to see a genuine smile from a good looking man.  He holds out a cup to me and I realize he’s offering me another coffee, and some company.  He’s not bad looking, has kind deep blue eyes, and his smile is probably just as contagious as Ruby’s, and maybe in another life I would have taken him up on his offer.  I can’t be around anyone right now, though. I’m damaged, and in need of solitude. There’s been too many people around me lately. I can’t seem to find a moment for myself.  It’s why I came for this walk in the first place, to get away from everyone. 

“Sorry, I have somewhere I need to be.” 

I feel bad for lying but it seems a gentler let down then the simple ‘no’ that was on the top of my tongue.  I rise, leaving my used mug on the table and head to the exit. The sky has darkened while I’ve been inside and I wonder how long I’d been sitting there alone.  The street lights have not yet come on and the buildings towering into the sky on either side of the street create a somber darkening atmosphere.

It’s fitting, there’s no light inside me, so why should there be any surrounding me.

I continue in the direction I was before, not wanting to return to the elder Arc’s home just yet.  It’s not long before the coffee warming me cools in my stomach and the freezing temperatures start seeping through my skin again.  I don’t mind, it’s oddly comforting. I find myself at a pier when I get to the bottom of the hill and I turn to follow it’s wooden slats.  I can hear the water lapping at the rocks beneath me and I feel the rhythmic pulse of the ocean reverberating through the boards beneath my feet.  

I come to a bench and sit, staring out at the ocean we will have to cross to get to our next destination.  It’s almost completely dark now, the street lights have come on but little of their light reaches me where I’m sitting.  There are a few lights swaying on the water in the distance, they look like stars but I know they are just from the fishing or military ships anchored further out from shore.  

It’s quiet.  It reminds me of the night we spent in that house, everything was so quiet that night, eerily so.  A group of seven shouldn’t be able to be as silent as we were; it should have been our first clue. 

I’d been so angry at myself, and honestly I still am.  Not for not knowing about the Apathy. I’d never heard of such Grimm, and I don’t know if I should blame my own lack of study habits or Beacon for not preparing us properly.  Just another thing to add to the Ozpin failure list. I’m starting to see my mother’s point about the man. I can’t agree with her selfish actions, I won’t. Even if the flame isn’t within me to guide me anymore I know I can follow Ruby, but without either… Maybe I wouldn’t be so different from her. I hope I never have to find out.

We’d faced many new Grimm in the last year, and never had any real trouble with them, but the extent the Apathy had affected us unnerved me.  We were all beaten down but in that wine cellar…

I’d almost lost everyone, I watched as I was about to lose  _ her.   _ I had felt nothing.  I watched as she said it was fine, as that creature reached out to her and the protective flame hadn’t ignited.  There was no flicker, no spark, no nothing. I just  _ watched _ . And I’d been fine with it.  It angers me so much that Ruby was the one to crawl to her, that Ruby was the one to act to protect her, while I did nothing.

“Yang,” her voice pierces the silence, but I don’t turn to acknowledge her.  What’s the point? 

I feel her presence tentatively coming closer until I catch her profile in my peripheral.  I focus on the bright lights of a ship in the distance to force my eyes from looking her way.  She hesitates at my silence and I feel her nervously shift, not knowing how to act around me like this.  I don’t blame her, I don’t even know how I’m supposed to act anymore. There’s just too much nothing, well there’s desperation and despair and sadness and loneliness and hopelessness. There’s that, but there’s no happiness, no strength, no hope within me anymore.  My guiding flame is gone and I don’t know how to get it back or if I ever will. I don’t know how to act because I’m not me anymore.

“Are you okay?” 

Her voice is soft but she comes closer and takes a seat in the empty space beside me.  She sits for many minutes, half turned towards me, but after it’s clear I won’t answer she copies my position and stares out into the darkness.

It’s weird, this silence between us.  It was never this awkward. We used to be able to sit in silence for hours and I used to enjoy it.  I’d enjoy watching a movie or flipping through a magazine as she sat and read one of her many books.  I used to enjoy sneaking glances her way when she was immersed in whatever world the words she read took her to.  She was so expressive as she reacted to the stories and characters she was reading about, more expressive than she was in real life when she knew others were watching her.  But now I can’t bring myself to look at her because I’m afraid I’ll either see her lying there in the wine cellar about to die or I’ll hear those words again.

She shivers beside me and I realize I’ve lost track of time again.  The sky is completely black and there are less lights on the water now then there was the last time I was aware of my surroundings.  

“Why are you still here?” I barely recognize my own voice.  When did it get so sharp and scornful?

To her credit she doesn’t flinch or indicate she notices any difference at all.  The corner of my eye catches her mouth open and close. She’s thinking, and must realize I’m not asking why she’s still sitting beside me in this cold darkness.

“Because I said I’m not going anywhere.” Her whispers are carried into the air in a puff of white fog as they leaves her lips. “And I mean it.”

“You’ve said things before,” my voice is now even, “similar things.  Did you not mean them?”

“Of course I-“

“Then why should I believe you now?” I cut her off not wanting her to finish her lie.

“Because I promised.” I scoff and that does cause a reaction from her.  She turns towards me and I spare her a glance. She looks hurt by my reaction, but also determined. “And I’ll sit here on this bench for as long as you need,” she keeps her eyes locked to mine, “I’ll walk by your side for however many miles, and I’ll protect your back from everything you need me to for as long as you need me to until you believe me.”

_ ‘I’ll protect you.’ _

“I don’t need your protection.” I yell at her. She flinches and I stand up because I can’t have her this close to me when I’m this angry at her.  I would never forgive myself if I hurt her.

“Just leave.” I lean against the railing of the boardwalk. The small waves I look down on are in direct contrast to the tidal waves of negative emotions raging inside of me.  

“No.”

“Why?” She doesn’t answer and I know it’s because her answer is the same and I already told her I don’t believe it. “I don’t want you here.”

The silence stretches very thin before she speaks.  Her voice quivers as she asks “Is that true?”

I can’t answer her because I don’t think the lie will be convincing coming from my mouth.  

“Just go back to Menagerie, go back to your parents and other friends.” You grip the wooden rail for support. “Go back to Sun.”

I hear her stand and soon she’s leaning her hip on the rail, appraising me.

“What does that mean?” The softness in her voice pulls my eyes to hers, even though I’m trying to not look at her.  I stare, without answering. 

My eyes roam freely now that I’ve stopped fighting them.  She hasn’t changed. Her golden eyes are the same shade, and their cat-like slant still captivates me.  I miss the way her lips always quirked into a barely noticeable grin when she caught me looking at her. There’s no lift or amusement to them now and I pull my eyes away.  Her bow is gone, so I guess she has changed a little bit. I like her better without it. She looks more like Blake to me now. 

“You stopped wearing your bow.”

“Yeah, I didn’t really need it in…” her voice drifts off.

“Menagerie.” I finish for her.  

We’re both silent and I can’t bear looking at her anymore, it hurts too much. My eyes return to the waves below.

“What did you mean when you told me to go back,” she spins to lean her back on the rail, taking her eyes off me as well.  Part of me thinks she subconsciously does it to watch our backs, she’s always been more aware of potential ambushes than me.  I think it’s due to her past with the White Fang. “Why’d you mention Sun?”

“Is he the one that convinced you to lose the bow?”

“What?” I can feel her eyes back on me but I refuse to look up from the waves. “No, I I got rid of it before he showed up. What’s Sun have to do with me wearing the bow or not?”

“It’s not about the bow.” I reply quietly.

“Then what is it about?”

It’s about you sharing a part of yourself, a part of your life with someone other than me.  I want to say it but I know I can’t so I settle.

“Never mind.” I push off the rail and spin taking a step around her, the route back to Jaune’s sister’s house. “We should be getting back before Ruby sends a search party.”

I feel pressure pulling back on my right arm and look down to see her fingers wrapped around it.  I push forward, trying to break her hold but she pulls and the next thing I know I’m facing her.

“Yang, please.” She’s looking at me with such desperation. I don’t like seeing that look in her eyes. “Talk to me.”  Look in her eyes or not, she doesn’t have the right to ask that of me. 

“Like you talked to me before you left?”  She drops her hand from my arm and takes a step back.

“Yang, I-“

“I don’t want to hear it.” 

“Do you want me to talk or do you want me to be quiet?” Blake grits through her clenched teeth. “Make up your mind.”  I’m silent because I do want to hear her reasons, this is what I’ve wanted since I laid eyes on her at Haven. But I’m scared of her answers.  What if they’re not what I want? What if my worst assumptions are correct? What if she just doesn’t need me like I need her?

I think I already know the answer to that last one.  She left, without looking back. Someone would have had to kill me to tear me away from her if the roles were reversed.  I look at my feet.

“I don’t know anymore.” She’s silent and I know she’s waiting for me to elaborate and I’m trying to get my thoughts in order but how do you decide between one bad option and another? “I thought I wanted to know, I wanted to talk to you.” I sigh, still struggling for the words but I’m so tired, and this time there are no Apathy around to blame it on. 

I make my way back to the rail, I prefered the sound the waves were making and I thought maybe they would help me focus.  I turn to sit on the cold ground, leaning my back up against the wood.

“But you just seemed too busy to want to talk to me.” I cross my legs and watch my flesh fingers tap the fingers of my metal ones.  I reverse the process focussing on my accuracy with my robotic arm. It’s an exercise I’ve done since putting the new arm on. It helps me feel connected to it, even if I know I can’t really feel what it’s fingers touch, I can feel it touching my flesh ones and it tricks me into thinking I do have feeling below the elbow of my right arm.  “And now…”

Blake sits beside me, hugging her thighs to her chest. I can tell she’s looking just as intently at my hand exercises as I am.

“And now?” She asks after the silence has continued long enough she knew I wasn’t going to continue.

“Maybe it’s too late.”

“Don’t say that.” There’s an accusing tone to her voice. “What do you want to know? Ask me anything and I’ll answer it honestly, I promise.” She shuffles her legs closer to her body. “I owe you that much, at least.”

“How generous of you.” My metal thumb’s accuracy fails and it completely misses its fleshy counterpart that is its target.

“At least I’m trying. Which is more than I can say for you right now.”

It bugs me that she’s got a point.  She’s willing to sit here in the cold and answer my questions.  All I have to do is ask them, but where do I start?

“I don’t know where to start.” I admit.

“How about we start at that Sun comment you made?”

“You’re not going to drop that are you?”

“You’ve never had an issue with him before, but you hadn’t even looked at him or acknowledged him at all in Mystral.”

“So?” 

“So it’s not like you. Then you said his name like he kicked Zwei and now you’re avoiding the topic.”

“You promised.” I say quietly.  

“I am being honest.” She defends.

“No,” I lean my head back staring up at the stars above us, some are blotted out by wispy clouds but most of the sky is clear and there are millions of tiny torches.  “You promised not to run.”

“I know,” she says softly. “But what does that have to do with-“

“What did I do wrong?”

“Nothing.” She says quickly. “Yang, I’m not following. I don’t understand.”

“If I did nothing wrong then why do you trust him more than me?” I finally look at her and her ears twitch in my direction. “Is it because I’m human? Because I can’t help th-“

“Stop.” She holds her palm out to me as she sighs in aggravation. She pinches the bridge of her nose with her other hand. “I don’t understand why you’re asking this? You need to elaborate more.  I can’t answer your questions if I don’t know what you’re asking.”

I take a moment to process my thoughts again. I admit I’m being pretty sporadic with my questions and her answers aren’t helping me figure anything out this way.  

“When we found out you were a faunus you ran.” She nods. “Instead of coming to us, or even to me-“ I struggle, wondering if I should ask why she didn't trust me back then, but realize that would just be a tangent.  We were new team mates she didn’t need a reason more than that in the beginning. “-doesn’t matter. But you went to him. You told him your story and you took him to confront the White Fang.” She only nods, encouraging me to continue because I still haven’t asked her a question yet. 

“But you promised us you would come to us the next time.  And I thought I did a pretty good job of proving to you I could be trusted.  I mean I know you were questioning me during that Mercury fight thing.” She opens her mouth to cut me off but I raise my hand to stop her.  “I get it now. I didn’t then. It hurt me,  _ a lot  _ when you were even questioning me in that. But to have someone you thought you could trust, turn like Adam did.  I mean he  _ stabbed _ you. And-“ I realize my hands are balled into fists and I instantly relax them, taking a deep breath. “I could never do that to you, to anyone I cared about.  But he did it without any hesitation. I understood after that, how much it affected you to see me act out in a way that reminded you of him. I get it.” I shake the image of Adam out of my head, he has no right in there at this moment.  “But even after that, after all the rest we’d been through, to have you run again, without saying anything to me at the very least. Without waiting for me to wake up, and then to allow  _ him _ in again, instead of me. I want to know why?”

She runs her hand through her hair, and I watch as her soft ears dip to the sides to make room for her fingers to pass.  How much of Blake’s reactions and mannerisms have I missed with her wearing that stupid bow infuriates me.

“First of all, I never sought out Sun, either time.”  She looks at me and I want to believe her. She must see the skepticism in my eyes. “I ran from the dorm that first time and when I stopped, he was just there.  I had nowhere else to go. I didn’t take the time to see how you and Ruby were taking it, but I did see the horror on Weiss’ face. And I was scared I ruined everything with my confession.” She shrugs. “He was just at the right place at the right time.  I was feeling desperate and alone, and I knew he was less likely to judge me because of him being a faunus.”

“I would never-“

“I know that now,” she’s quick to cut me off, “but back then I was still terrified and expecting of the worst in people.  Weiss didn’t really boost my confidence at the time.”

You nod. “And this time?”

“This time,” she growls. “He followed me.  Like an actual stalker.”

“What?”

“I didn’t even know he was following me until the ship was halfway to Menagerie.” She rolls her eyes.  “The ship was attacked by a Sea Feilong, like a giant serpent thing, with wings.” I nod my head trying to picture it.  I remember hearing stories of them but have never seen one in person. “Sun came out of hiding to help me fight it and I was so angry with him after the fight.  I was pissed he had followed me.”

“But you let him stay.”  It wasn’t a question, his presence at Haven proves she did.

“Mmm,” she nods. “He was already on the ship so I put up with him.” She looks at me warily before she continues, like she’s unsure of her next answer. “He did help me though. He cheered me up at times and he was able to get me to see certain things in a new light.  He pulled me out of my self hating cycle and told me to stop blaming myself for everything. He was good for me.” She says the last bit slowly, carefully as if maybe she shouldn’t have said it.

“Good.” I feel like it’s anything but.  I dislike him more knowing how he was able to help her and I wasn’t.  Not that she’d given me the chance. 

“But him being at my side instead of you had nothing to do with me trusting him more than you.  It had nothing to do with you being a human.” She dips her head to catch my lowering eyes and only continues once she has my attention. “There is no one, besides my parents, that I trust more, than I trust you, Yang.”

She promised she’d tell me the truth, but if that’s the truth then-

“Then why did you leave? Why not wait until I was awake? I would have come with you.”

She looks down at the ground in front of her feet.  She shuffles one foot forward to kick a small pebble through the cracks in the wooden slats. 

“Because it was supposed to be a journey to punish myself.  I was supposed to be alone. And I had a feeling if I waited any longer one of you would have stopped me.”

She’s not looking at you and you know it means she’s keeping part of the story from you.  

“It wasn’t your fault. I never blamed you for this….” I lift my metal appendage into the space between us.

“I was worried you’d feel that way.”

“Worried?” I question incredulously. “If you knew I wouldn’t blame you then why run?”

“Because even if you don’t see it that way it was, no it is my fault.”  

“You just finished telling me Sun taught you not to blame yourself.” I point out.

“When Ilia injured him I blamed myself. He got me to see that fighting with or for me was his choice, and that it hurt him when I pushed him out, more than the pain of Ilia’s attack.”

I think I like Ilia a little more. 

“And you saw things his way?”

“Yeah, he has a way of making people believe in him.” A soft smile tugs at the edges of her mouth when she talks about him and I have to avert my eyes to get away from it. 

“You’re confusing me.” I state, picking up a rock I suddenly find beside my leg. I examine it as I continue talking. “Why do you see things his way with his injury but not with mine? Is it because it was Adam?”

“Yes, and no.”

I wait for her to elaborate.  And I wait some more.

“You going to explain that a little more?”

“Yang,” she hesitates. “Why did it bother you Sun was with me?”

“We just went over this!” I exclaim, getting frustrated. “Because I thought it meant you trusted him more than me.”

“I just admitted I trust my parents the same as you, why doesn’t that bother you?”

“Because they are your parents.” I don’t understand where she is taking this.  How does this have to do with me losing my arm or with Adam.

“If you told me you trusted your mom more than me I wouldn’t like that.”

“You parents are nothing like my mother.”

“What’s the difference that has you angry at me trusting Sun, but not angry at me trusting anyone else over you?”

“What’s with the questions, I thought you were supposed to be answering mine?”

I’m being defensive I know that and I think she’s caught on too.   I know the reason, but I can’t tell her that. She can’t know my feelings. I can’t tell her how the thought of him sharing any of her memories where I’m absent hurts like an Beringel punch to the guts.  

“If I told you Sun and I were dating would you be okay with it?”

My breath hitches in my throat.  No, they can’t be. This is why I didn’t want to have this conversation.  Being in the dark was safer. There I could pretend I was reading too much into their relationship.  That the kiss I caught her giving him at the train station was just a farewell goodbye to a friend and not a promise of more when they met up again.  

“Yes,”

“You’re a very bad liar,” she sighs beside me. “You always have been.”

“Why would I care who you date?”

“Why don’t you tell me?”

She’s challenging me and I can’t help but take my eyes off the stone I’m twirling in my hand to face her. Suddenly she’s moving. She lifts herself to her feet and walks the two strides separating us, lowering herself in front of me before I can even process her reasons for moving closer.  She sits cross legged facing me, our knees touching lightly. She reaches to take each of my hands in hers and brings them to rest with hers between our knees. 

“I think I know what it means even if you won’t voice it.”  I stay resolutely silent at her statement, but she rolls her eyes cutely at my stubbornness.  There’s no way she can know the extent of my feelings. “Adam is a very vindictive and possessive individual.”

“Okay, so we’re jumping right in huh?”

“Do you want to hear this or not?” I nod my head and close my mouth. “He taught me to fight, taught me the meaning of being passionate about what you believe in and taught me to stand resolute in the face of those that would bring you down.” Her shoulders slump and her ears pin to the back of her skull. “He gave me a place by his side and it was a position I enjoyed for a time.  He was my mentor and more, and I was... just his.” Her hands tighten on my own and she stares at them but is seeing something else. “ I knew he would be angry that I left. I knew it was something he wouldn’t easily forgive but the extent of his anger of his  _ malice _ …” her eyes are pained when she suddenly looks up from our hands. “I never expected him to be that far gone.  Attacking innocent people, even pairing up with someone like Cinder I could believe. He was hungry for power, but to do what he did.”

“Hey,” I try to snap her out of it. “It’s okay.  He did this not you.”

“He did it because of me.”

“He was trying to kill you and I got in his way.” I squeeze her hands because she looks like she’s about to start crying and as mad as I’ve been at her I don’t want her to cry, especially not over someone like him.

She shakes her head. “No,  you didn’t end up like this because you got in his way Yang.”  She takes a couple steadying breaths before she looks into my eyes again. “Adam is strong, he is fast, his skills are honed.  I’ve rarely seen anyone a match for him. You were no match for him.” 

“Obviously.” It hurts to hear her admit it out loud, even if it is true.

“You aren’t getting it.” She scoffs. “He could have easily beaten you, without his weapon. In a hand to hand fight, even with your semblance activated, he could have fought you and won.  He could have beaten you, depleted your aura and left you weakened. Instead, because of me he decided to use his semblance on you.”

“He just wanted it over sooner.  It doesn’t have to mean it was because of you Blake.”

“He said because I left him, that he was going to make it his mission to kill everything I-“ her voice shakes but she takes a deep breath and continues. “He said he’d destroy everything I love. Yang, he doesn’t use his semblance unless he has to.  It’s not something that can be used all the time. It drains him. And he could have beaten you without it. He used it on you so he could cut through your aura. He used it because he wanted me to watch you die.”

“Blake I don’t-“

“He saw it in my eyes.” Her thumb runs circles along the flesh of my left palm. “I heard your voice and when I saw you he saw it written as plain as day.  He knew, and he’d just promised to destroy it.”

“I don’t,” I don’t understand is what I started to say, but looking at her, going over the conversation quickly in my mind.  She can’t be saying… She can’t. “What did he see?” Her eyes are pleading with me but I won’t back down. “What did he see in your eyes?” She has no choice but to answer, she’d promised to answer any question I asked honestly.

“He saw that I loved you more than I’d ever loved him.”

I gasp as the spark ignites the small flame at my core.

It can’t be true, she can’t mean it.

“I do.”  I hadn’t known I said it out loud.  

I look into her eyes, searching, but there’s no hesitation, no second guessing her answer.  She means it, or at least she did.

“You loved me?”  I need her to clarify.  I’ve never needed her to answer a question more than I need her to answer this one.  She’s taking so long to respond though and it’s driving me crazy. 

“Yang,” she squeezes my hand leaning forward slightly. “Yes, I loved you. And to answer your next question, I love you still. Maybe even a little more.”

“More?” The question comes out as more of a squeak than anything and I’m embarrassed at my lack of composure.

“Well they say absence makes the heart grow fonder.” She shrugs, looking down at our hands. “And I missed you, more than I’ve missed anyone before in my whole life.  And I don’t want to ever feel that way again.”

“Blake.”

“I’m not leaving your side again.  I promise. Even if-“ a pained expression overtakes her beautiful face and it hurts me as if I’d been cut. “Even if you don’t feel the same way about me.  I’ll understand and I just ask you let me stand by your side as your friend.” She takes a deep breath before looking resolutely into my eyes. “Because I just want to make sure you’re safe and happy.”

“Are you going to run from me again?” Because I don’t think I could survive it a third time.

“Never.” She says it with such conviction I can’t not believe her. And the fire in me burns a little brighter.

“Okay,” I say and punctuate it with a nod of my head.

“Okay?” She questions because it isn’t really an answer.  

I lean forward and connect out foreheads.  “Yeah, okay.”

She’s nervous and looks everywhere.  Her amber eyes flit to either one of mine multiple times before looking to my nose, or maybe it’s my lips, then they travel further to our still holding hands.  I can feel her fingers twitching lightly in my palm.

“Can I ask you one more question?” I whisper, knowing it would be more than loud enough.  It still seems like it comes out too overbearing.

“Yes.”

I tilt my chin and it forces her head up at a different angle.  Our noses graze and I can feel her steadying breaths on my cheek.

“Can I kiss you?”

She sucks in a breath at my request but I catch a glimpse of the small grin she only gives to me.

“Yes.”

I press forward and our lips meet for the first time.  I’m not even all that worried about my chapped lips. She loves me, chapped lips aren’t a deal breaker when someone loves you.  I swear my heart stops as she melts into me. Her lips are perfect, they move against mine and I press further, wanting to taste more of them.  I’m rewarded when she parts her lips and allows my tongue entrance. And then the best thing ever happens.

Blake moans into my mouth.  

I can’t help the smile that spreads across my face.  It makes deepening the kiss impossible, but I’m still hearing the echo of Blake’s moan in my head and suddenly I’m laughing.  The flame actually tickles as it licks at the walls of my soul. It chases the cold out and I just can’t believe Blake is here, in front of me. She loves me and she’s what I’ve needed to make myself whole again.

“It doesn’t help my confidence that you’re laughing in the middle of kissing me.”

“I’m sorry. I’m just really happy.”

“Kisses make you happy? Good to know.”

I shake my head. “You make me happy.”

“Yang,” she blushes and it’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.

“I love you.”

Her eyes snap to mine and she must see the same conviction as I feel at saying that.  The same conviction she’d said it to me with.

“I love you too.”

I peck her lips one last time, she must know I only meant for it to be a quick kiss because she brings her one had to snake around the back of my neck and holds my lips to hers for longer.  I oblige but I’m very aware of the ice at the back of my neck and it’s killing the mood. It takes me a minute to realize the ice is actually Blakes fingers and I pull back. When I touch her wrist to pull it from behind me I realize just how cold she is.

“Come on,” I say standing up and pulling her with me. “We should get you back and warmed up.” 

“But there’s more we have to talk about.”

“I know and before we can really start whatever this is.” I point to each of us in turn. “We will have to have a few more talks I’m sure.  I can’t promise I’m not going to be angry and a little hard to deal with still. I-“ I pause, wondering if now is the best time to be confessing, but I don’t want there to be secrets between us anymore. “I miss my arm and I still get phantom pains and flashes and it can make me testy. That and the whole you went off and had an adventure with Sun and not me is still going to rub me the wrong way sometimes. I can’t promise it’s going to be easy to be with me right now Blake.”

“I understand, but we can work through it together right?”

“Absolutely.” I nod my head. “And I feel a little better that Ilia got a good one in on Sun.  I think I like her for that fact alone. Too bad we never got to chat, I bet she has some great pre-Beacon Blake stories.” 

Blake laughs, grabbing my hand and dragging me down the street. “I wouldn’t go rushing in trading battle stories just yet.”

“Why? She’s your friend right?”

“Yes and she’s great, but… there’s just some things you don’t know about her.”

“Like what?”

“I’ll tell you later, I’m cold and a little hungry.  Do you think Nora and Ruby have left any of those sandwiches for us?”

“Blake,” I whine trying to get her to explain the deal with Ilia.

“I’ll make you a deal,” she says instead. “If you can beat me back to the Arc residence I will answer one more of your questions.”

She takes off at a run and even though I know I’m going to lose I chase after her. 

_ ‘I’ll protect you.’ _

She loves me and wants me to be safe, and because she loves me I have a larger target on my back than I originally thought.  Adam will try again, I know he will. But with Blake by my side, and the flames blazing in my heart again, there’s no way we can lose this time.

And I don’t mind so much that she wants to protect me, because she doesn’t pity me or think I’m weak, she just loves me and wants me to be safe.  I feel the same way about her. It doesn’t sound so bad that we will be protecting one another. There’s no one else I’d trust to protect my back that the faunus sprinting in front of me.  

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



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